The Inescapable Peril of Co-Parenting (The series)

Each day I live on God’s green earth I understand Him a little better. I understand why it was intended for children to born into a home of marriage, not wedlock. I like to call wedlock a nice term for CONFUSION. Confusion is what one can expect when we do not play the game of life as it is intended to be played. Of course I know life isn't a game, however when dealing with children born of broken homes it seems as if parenting turns into a competition. Parenting can turn into a match about who did the most and vice versa. This occurs when one or both of the parties are bitter about the past, coupled with the “outsider’s” influence/opinions; a recipe for disaster.

In co-parenting a lot of confusion today is caused by the “outside”. The outside meaning others you DID NOT lay with to make that child that EVERYONE has something to say about. In my own life I have seen how the “outside” has poisoned my own relationship with my child. In my instance it’s an overbearing grandparent that has helped hinder a relationship instead of encouraging it. One should want better for their children and grandchildren.

Contrary to the belief of many ALL children deserve a father. All children that are the product of a broken home deserve to have their father, especially an active and willing father. However when the “outsiders” show up they bring up the past, they sow discord, they make it hard for the mother and father to establish a healthy bond for the sake of the child. Now I’m not speaking about the fathers that can’t be a part of their children’s lives due to legal situations or something beyond their current control. I am speaking of the father that wants to be a part but has a hard time due to the “OUTSIDE”. The “outside” are the ones saying, “Giirrrlll I would out him on child support he just bought a new car”. Or the men, “Man I would just leave her alone and move on to the next chick”. These are the people we all should listen to the least. A real friend, real family would be trying to encourage togetherness, peace and love for the sake of the child they claim to love so much.

We will talk more about this in the coming weeks. Today the message to us all is to limit the outside influence when it comes to co-parenting, raising our children. We need to seek God first, NOT each other. Last but certainly not least once you've sought God and found His peace in your situation DO as HE instructed us to do LOVE ONE ANOTHER. Yes, even that individual that wronged you. Yes, we must love that mother, that father even the grandmother that wronged us when it came down to our very own child.

Until next time…..